Life Without Baby

Filling the silence in the motherhood discussion

Guest Post: What Bella Lucia Means to Me July 19, 2012

Joanne Troppello: The author at work.

By Joanne Troppello

I write romantic suspense novels and my most recent release is entitled, Bella Lucia. It is a story unlike my other suspense books, but I felt compelled to write it. My hope was that other women like me might find some hope and encouragement that they are not alone.

My husband, John and I, met back in 2002 and we quickly became good friends. Two years later we were married. This July, we’ll be celebrating our 8th anniversary. We’ve gone through the normal married stuff—you know, adjusting to life as a couple and all the issues that come with that—but one issue has left us feeling isolated in our little section of the universe. After 8 years together, we still have not been able to get pregnant.

It’s been a difficult road, but we have grown so much together as a couple and we’ve gotten stronger, but that hasn’t made the inherent pain of being a childless couple any easier to deal with. My husband comes from a big, traditional, Italian family. Of his cousins, we were the second couple to get married. In the ensuing years, his other cousins and brother have gotten married and they’ve all been able to conceive and have children. On my side, my two brothers and their wives also have been able to get pregnant, as have two of my cousins.

Needless to say, being around everyone who seemed so naturally to get pregnant hasn’t been easy; especially as we near year 8 in our marriage. Others, who have been married for less time, already have children. Although, God has been good and He’s brought friends into our lives in similar situations and we’ve been able to support each other through the ups and downs of trying to get pregnant. My one friend has been married for 10 years and they still haven’t been able to conceive yet.

Living with this ache in my heart, always feeling the call of motherhood, but never being able to have a child, led me to write Bella Lucia. As I mentioned, I write fiction and I felt God leading me to create a story dealing with the subject of infertility and all the painful struggles involved, yet weave His hope into the plot. Even though this story is fiction, it’s a very personal story for me and I wanted to share how when you invite God into the midst of your circumstances, He always turns everything out for your good…even during the hard times.

When I wrote about the main character, Gwen, looking longingly at the empty chairs surrounding her dining room table—that was familiar to me, because I’ve done that, and felt the longing. When I wrote about Gwen being in pain when her best friend so easily got pregnant after only a short time married, I went through that pain as well with other family members conceiving so easily. When Gwen’s heart was broken every time she would pass by the local playground on her daily jog and see the children playing and mother’s sitting watching their children, I felt her pain…wondering if I’d ever become a mother.

I know what it feels like to desperately want to be a mother and have a family. Yet, I know the peace that passes all understanding as God is guiding me and my husband through this rough time in our lives. He has a plan and I may not understand it, but I know He has our best in mind. Of course, it’s not always easy to believe that, but our faith is what has gotten us through and will continue to guide us.

Joanne Troppello is an author of romantic suspense novels and has published three books: Shadowed RemembrancesMr. Shipley’s Governess and Bella Lucia. She is married and loves spending time with her husband, family and friends. You can connect with her online at My Blog: The Mustard Seed, on Facebook, or on Twitter.

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9 Responses to “Guest Post: What Bella Lucia Means to Me”

  1. Lisa, thanks so much for hosting me today and giving me the chance to share my story. 🙂

  2. Kelly M. Says:

    This post gave me chills. I pray that someday (hopefully soon) you get your prayers answered.

  3. Jenny Says:

    I enjoyed this post and really appreciate your comments about faith. Mine is a bit wobbly at the moment but it is still in there somewhere…

    • Jenny, thank you for stopping by. I know the feeling. Every day is a new chance to pick myself up again and make it through another day. Without my faith, I don’t think I’d have made it this far. I appreciate you sharing. Thanks 🙂

  4. Crystal Says:

    Thanks, Joanne, for sharing! I was so blessed. My husband & I have only started this journey compared to you, but we are trusting that God knows what He is doing, even if it hurts right now. I will check out your book!

  5. Crystal Says:

    Can you get a paper edition of your book? I don’t have Kindle.

    • Crystal, I’m glad you stopped by. It’s definitely a daily journey trusting God for His plan for our lives. Thanks for checking out my book. It was released in ebook in March and has been out for about four months. The print edition should be released in the next few months. I don’t have a monthly newsletter yet, but if you want to get updated when the print edition is being released, feel free to email me through my website or follow me on facebook or twitter. Have a good weekend! Thanks again for sharing. 🙂

    • Crystal, just wanted to let you know that my book, Bella Lucia, is now out in paperback. Thanks again for your interest. 🙂


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