Life Without Baby

Filling the silence in the motherhood discussion

It’s All About Attitude October 3, 2011

Thanks to Iris for forwarding this article about living happily without children.

I love this author’s attitude to the hand she’s been dealt. At first read, she seems almost flippant about her inability to have children, but she’s packed a whole life story into one article, and reading between the lines, it’s clear to see the pain she felt, the struggles she and her partner went through in coming-to-terms with being childfree, and the attitudes she still has to endure from others. But her whole outlook was encapsulated in this paragraph:

“We didn’t get to have something. We had 2 choices as a result of that – let it control, dictate and sadden the rest of our lives or find something else to do instead. Either way, we still wouldn’t get to have kids. So which is the best choice?”

Are you still struggling to come to terms with your own situation and feeling that childlessness is “controlling, dictating, and saddening” your life? If so, can you see what your “find something else to do instead” could be? And could you do it?

I don’t this author is trivializing the blow she was dealt – far from it – but I love that she’s found a way to turn her situation to her advantage. What do you think?


8 Responses to “It’s All About Attitude”

  1. stacerella Says:

    She’s wise beyond her years turning it all around and taking advantage of her life’s lot like that. Bravo to her and her husband for being able to find a way to live another kind of lifestyle. They rock.

  2. mccxxiii Says:

    I haven’t gotten past the first paragraph yet, but I just want to point out the irony/cruelty/black humor that I’m being served an ad for Zulily posh baby clothes on the page that contains this online article …

  3. CiCi Says:

    Great article indeed! Thanks for sharing. Hit home for me today 🙂

    *And I must agree with the irony of the baby clothes ad on the page as well lol

  4. lmanterfield Says:

    Well, shows the power of advertising, I never even noticed the ads. Ugh! So sorry for inflicting that on you.

    • Mccxxiii Says:

      Oh, it’s not you it’s just some algorithm. When I pulled this up on my iPad it gave me an ad for “Fix Your Thyroid” … they’re at least getting closer to my middle-aged demographic! 🙂

  5. Iris D Says:

    Lisa, I think I’m coming to the realization that for me “the something else to do instead” is really going to be just about focusing my attention on nurturing and loving others (people, animals, plants)… taking care of my hubby, letting my family, aunts, uncle, parents, cousins, brother, sister-in-law, niece and nephew know in a myriad of ways how special they are to me, building stronger bonds of friendship, volunteering for causes I care about, making new friends, planting my garden… and maybe even getting a pet (maybe).

  6. themissruby Says:

    i LOVED her article – she is living the life i want to be leading but alas never will because i’m married to a homebody!

    i’m printing her article out to remind myself to be living every day to the fullest from now now, thank you SO much for sharing.


  7. loribeth Says:

    Great article — thanks for sharing, Lisa (& Iris)!

    Not sure I am 100% where she is, but I definitely aspire to being there!

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