Life Without Baby

Filling the silence in the motherhood discussion

It Got Me Thinking About…Minivans! February 22, 2011

By Kathleen Guthrie

Aside from the obvious fears of pregnancy and childbirth – related pains and complications, what I dreaded most about becoming a mom someday was the transition from hot babe to minivan driver. Whenever friends waxed poetical about their automatic sliding doors, roomy seats, and safety features (really?), I wanted to gag. Not me. No way. Never, I thought.

Be careful what you wish for, right?

But now that I know there will be no children to haul around, I’m excited to rediscover a whole wonderful world of fun cars. And because I won’t be funding anyone’s college education (see “Money” post), it’s possible I could pull one out of my garage some day. Here are a few I’m ogling:

Sure the red-hot Mercedes-Benz SLK-Class screams midlife crisis, but who cares?! It’s gorgeous! “With a retractable hardtop that transforms it from coupe to open roadster in 22 seconds,” it allows me to imagine I could be the next Danica Patrick, hair flowing in the wind as I zoom around the track…or just out to dinner. I also love that the description includes “Seats 2 adults.” Yup, that’s us.

The 2011 Jeep Wrangler has a tagline that reads, “The Ultimate Experience for the Person who Wants Freedom to Explore.” And because there’s no one in the backseat being cranky, I can go wherever I want, whenever I want. That’s Freedom, baby!

Porsche now makes family-friendly vehicles, including the 4-door Cayenne hybrid. They’re stylish, I think, but my heart still belongs to the classic Boxster. Top down, a drive along the coast, Beyonce on the stereo. No room for packing a playpen, stroller, or quilted bag filled with “entertainment” and drippy snacks for the kids. P-a-r-a-d-i-s-e.

I’m sure the marketing execs at Harley-Davidson hired supermodel Marisa Miller to entice men of all shapes and sizes to buy a motorcycle, but I’m here to tell them that I’m also looking to pick up the bling, boots, pants, and leather jacket she’s wearing. (Are they washable? It doesn’t matter!)

Gullwing doors, plush leather seats, a stereo system that automatically ejects songs performed by The Wiggles…. So many fabulous possibilities. Vrooom!

Kathleen Guthrie is a Northern California–based freelance writer. She currently gets around in a hip Scion xB.

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6 Responses to “It Got Me Thinking About…Minivans!”

  1. Mali Says:

    Wonderful! I always said I wanted a two-door convertible if I couldn’t have kids. 7 years on, no convertible, but the nice thing is knowing I could have one if I wanted!!

  2. Laura Nye Says:

    Yes! Good point, Kathleen. We don’t ever have to buy a “family vehicle” with those stupid tv screens in the seats. I’m so glad they don’t show those Brooke Shields VW commercials any more about people who get pregnant just to buy a certain car. gag. I’ve always wanted a Volvo wagon, but now I’m not so sure. I drive a Subaru wagon which I love and I consider it a sporty, outdoorsy kinda car as opposed to a family car.
    What I dreaded most about being a mom was having to attend kid birthday parties on weekends. Now I only have to attend two kid birthday parties a year for my nephews. I make it a rule not to go to my friends’ kids’ parties.

  3. Rach Says:

    our next car is going to be an all wheel drive – which is probably a “family” car but we’re buying it because a] we can afford it because we don’t have children and b] we like it and agree on it – which is a miracle in itself!!

    *rant coming up*

    re the harley – the Guv has a hankering for a nightrod and they would be the ONLY harley i would ever let him buy but even then – he’s never going to get one if i have anything to do with it! harleys are “badge whore” bikes pure and simple, they aren’t good bikes and people get them purely so people will look at them and so that they can say “i have a harley”. i read something the other day that made me laugh “real riders, don’t ride harleys”

    *rant over*

    he DOES have TWO motorcycles though which we can afford because we don’t have children. if we had children, i doubt he’d had ONE, no matter two.

    and i’m drooling over that mercedes – and red too! where do i sign up for one?!?

    ~x~

  4. Kate B Says:

    A nice, expensive car is one of the things I do – and continue to plan to – treat myself with since we don’t have kids. Right now, it’s kind of relative, I drive an Infiniti. It’s not top of the line expensive, but it’s definitely something that wouldn’t have been in the picture with a kid. My next car is going to be the “I’m saving to eliminate all credit card debt car.” Likely it will be a Ford. Then – I’m going whole hog. I want a Mercedes Benz. The only thing that may stop me for a few years is the kind of winters we have up here. I may wait until we move to warmer climes for fear of damaging my baby in the snow. Until then, I’ll think of Janis Jopling….Oh Lord won’t you buy me a Mercedes Benz…..

  5. lmanterfield Says:

    Love this! My Honda turns 12 this year and she’s been so good to me. I have my eye on a nice Nissan Leaf if I can figure out where to plug it in. And then in my fantasy I want a nice little 1960’s ttwo-seater MG Midget (red, of course.) In this particular fantasy, I fix it up myself, polish her until she shines, and then put on a headscarf and shade a la Grace Kelly and drive Jose up and down PCH with wind wafting my scarf being me. 🙂 No room for a car seat in an MG!

  6. […] This post was originally published on February 22, 2011 […]


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