Life Without Baby

Filling the silence in the motherhood discussion

Finding Her Place After Infertility September 23, 2010

Several months ago, one of our sisters, Wendy, was in crisis. She had been working as a child development specialist, but after her infertility diagnosis she realized she could no longer stand to work in that environment. She quit her job and then found herself, in her words, “trying to find out who the hell I am and what to do with my life.”

Well, she found out. A couple of weeks ago she got a call out-of-the-blue, and last week she left for Bangladesh to take a position with UNICEF as a pre-primary education consultant.

I’ve never met Wendy, but I’ve been following her journey on the forum, and I’m so inspired by her accomplishments. Here’s a woman who was knocked sideways by her unplanned childlessness, and yet she’s found her way.

She told me:

I have spent a lot of time thinking, and the only way I can make sense of my infertility is that maybe [it] means I can and should continue development work. Rather than focus only on the children who might be living with me under my roof, I can impact so many more children. Indirectly, yes, but many more. Working in international development, I can work to improve their schools, their home life, their health and sanitation, their nutrition, their families’ lives.

Congratulations, Wendy. Good luck in your new endeavor.

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3 Responses to “Finding Her Place After Infertility”

  1. Aja Gold Says:

    That is so inspiring! Wendy will have a tremendous impact on all the people she touches. I am also hoping for “a sign” to guide me.

  2. Mali Says:

    That’s great. One of the things I’ve done is sponsor a child in Africa. At least I know I’m having a positive impact on her life.

    I’m not sure that we need a “sign.” I think living our best life – in whatever way – is going to make us happy. Of course, I do joke that I still wonder what I want to be when I grow up, so maybe I do need that sign!

  3. lmanterfield Says:

    I must say that now I know I won’t have children I feel a sense of freedom that I can do anything I choose with my life. But yes, I do have to figure out what that is! Don’t want to rush into this growing up thing!


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