Life Without Baby

Filling the silence in the motherhood discussion

Cracking open that door again June 16, 2010

About a month ago a very nice gentleman contacted me and asked if I would review his new book on this blog. The book’s title was A Baby at Last! and was co-authored by this man and two fertility doctors. I politely explained that I didn’t think our audiences were the same group of people, but he replied that the book also contained a section about moving on without children. “Okay,” I said. “I’ll take a look.”

The book has been burning a hole through my office floor ever since. I haven’t even taken it out of the envelope. There are three reasons for this:

  1. The author is a friend of a friend, or at least an acquaintance of a friend, and I feel obligated to write something positive about his book.
  2. There’s no way on this green earth I can recommend a fertility book to the women who I know read this site. It goes against everything we’re attempting to do here.
  3. And here the rest of the truth comes out: It hasn’t been long since my shelf-full of fertility books went into a Goodwill bag and out of my house forever. The very last thing I want to do is crack open that door again. What if, in turning to the chapter on moving on, I inadvertently spot some new idea, something I’ve never seen before, a solution that just might work for me? What if it triggers a tailspin and undoes all the positive progress I’ve been making?

But, according to the Press Release, the book is out today, and a promise is a promise, so tonight I’m going to crack it open and find out what the authors have to say about moving on. With luck, I’ll have some great advice to pass along, but if there’s no post tomorrow, you’ll know why.

Wish me luck.

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2 Responses to “Cracking open that door again”

  1. Jennifer Gill Says:

    Best of luck, Lisa – and thank you for sharing this. I get the same feeling sometimes, after the relief of making peace with this childless path, that what IF somehow a “miracle” happened? That thought fills me with dread now, less for all the decisions that would have to be considered than for opening that door again and letting in all the triggers. Are you just reading the one chapter? Might be healthier…

  2. Kathryn Says:

    You’ve got my best wishes.

    Thanks for the feedback on my previous comment. I do know that fostering (or even adoption) is NOT for us. We’ve checked it out as far as possible, & we can’t. I’ll keep your other recommendations in mind. 🙂


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